Little Steps & Big Decisions


Hello, ladies and gentlemen. I’m back.

It’s been two months since 2017 started, and unlike its predecessor, 2017 is behaving well *touches wood*. It’s been a year of making a couple of selfish choices, and even with all my inhibitions, I feel quite good. If you follow me on Instagram, you would know what’s up (considering it’s the only social media platform that I don’t totally hate), but if you don’t then 1) what the hell are you doing? and 2) let’s catch you up:

* Started a bullet journal

I’ve meant to start a bullet journal since last year, and it finally happened.

 

This is my quote of the month for February, wise words by Justin Baldoni (Rafael Solano on Jane The Virgin). I fully intend to do a complete post celebrating my bullet journal, because frankly, it’s become quite an addiction. It’s a great way to keep all my plans in place, and to doodle and go nuts with bright, bold colors.

It just makes me really happy, period.

 

* Celebrated the little moments

You know how I’ve always despised the cheesy holidays like Valentine’s Day? Yeah, I made a conscious effort to not be such a Negative Nancy this year, and just enjoy whatever I could, in whatever way possible. Garima, Pankaj, Rahul and I had a little V-Day party (singles only, obviously) in college this year, and I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that we had more fun than a lot of couples.

I mean, who doesn’t love food?

 

* Decided to say ‘no’

I am guilty of overcommitting to situations and people who don’t deserve half of it; 2017 has been a step toward curbing that, too. I am really trying to do things that are feasible and put myself before anyone else, because come on, there comes a time when all of us have to pick ourselves, and not anybody else.

It’s not going to be pretty in the beginning, and there are going to be multiple accusations hurled right at you, but that’s all ephemeral. Stay strong, keep your head up, and keep going.

 

* Give back to those who deserve it

Very much like 2016, 2017 is also going to be a year of ‘no more free chances’. Only those who really, truly deserve another chance may get one, and that’s that. I’m honestly tired of people pretending to know nothing about what they do wrong, or where they screw up, and I’ve realized that it’s not my problem anymore.

At the other end of the spectrum, however, are people who have always stuck by my side in good times and bad (like my mom), and there’s pretty much nothing I wouldn’t do to make them happy.


Other than that, life has been pretty much the same like always (exams, classes, general chaos), and I’m completely fine with that. The lesser people in your life, the happier you are–true fact.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go watch Teen Wolf. See you soon!

Love,

Snigdha

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No Promises


Hello, ladies and gentlemen (and Sagar, who wanted something to read with his evening tea), I’m back.

So, 2017 started, Dad (who was home for the holidays) went back to New York, and a brand new semester of college began while the temperature of Delhi has been—wait for it—freaking seven degrees.

Ah, well. That is how the glamorous life of an engineering undergrad is.

So, since I’ve been busy adjusting to life with college in the new semester (and getting my ass kicked, since I just went ahead got my books today, two week since classes started), I haven’t had the time to actually sit down and write–which in no way means I haven’t been writing. Here is where the power of technology comes in, because the Drafts folder in my phone is where all the magic is stored.

I picked out a select few out of the sea of written bits that have been dwelling in my phone, and have decided to share it with the world. Here goes, enjoy:

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#Freedom

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#AllTheBrightPlaces

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#Persevere

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And, another very special thing that is aimed at anyone and everyone who I have had the opportunity to love (family and friends alike), as well as to all those who I shall cross paths with, in the future.

If there’s anything that I’ve learnt in the last couple of years of college, it is that promises mean very little (if at all). Not all of them get to fruition, and sometimes, with good reason.

Hence, this is me, not promising you.

I don’t promise to keep you first always, because there are going to be times where other people will need me more than you.

I don’t promise to be with you all hours of every day, because there will be times where you need your space, and there may be days where I’ll be needing mine.

I don’t promise to support you in whatever you’re doing, because it’s my job to keep you from making dumb decisions that you shall only regret later.

I don’t promise to forgive you instantly every single time, because I’m stubborn as hell and my anger takes time to cool off.

I don’t promise to tell you everything, because there some things that just aren’t meant to be shared.

Most importantly though, I don’t promise to love you, because love is just a word that doesn’t quite describe us completely.

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You see, once a writer, always a writer. No matter how boring and uninspiring daily life is. Now please excuse me, I have a movie to watch.

Until next time, and remember: it’s now or never.

Love,

Snigdha

That’s A Wrap: Goodbye 2016


Hi! Wish all of you lovely people a very happy and joyous 2017.

Slay this one like never, amigos!

I almost did not do the Rewind post for 2016, not because nothing happened this year (because trust me, a lot did), but because 90% of them are things I can’t present to you with evidence. First, I thought I’d explain the stories behind all the top three lessons of the month that I’ve shared with all of you for the past 11 months, but I couldn’t possibly do that without 1) taking up a lot of your time, and 2) offending at least six out of ten people who I’ve already buried the hatchet with.

And to be very honest, 2016 was one ratchet ride of a year, and this is not just my opinion. But, it still deserves a parting gift of sorts, a final farewell. Hence, I present to you Rewind 2016:

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*Family*

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2016 was off to a very rocky start; things were going everywhere, and most of which was out of my control. But there is one thing that always stays the same, and that is (not so surprisingly) family.

My father was several time zones away, in New York, and despite the twenty million things she deals with on the daily, my mother has been the best support I could ever ask for. She was there for all of it: the good, the bad and the ugly. She held me close during the dark days that broke my heart to the littlest of pieces, and kept urging me to move forward, choose the high road (and kick ass when the situation demanded it).

My baby sister (now ten years old) is a little devil, but she’s my little devil, and I love her to bits. We fight every single day over the silliest of things, but when it’s time to go to sleep, we sleep like conjoined twins. That’s sisters for you, I guess.

Another person who kept me from going flying over the edge was, well, me. I have always been a stubborn person, and I don’t understand and agree with things just because someone says it’s true; I need to experience it to believe it. Clearly, when the going got rough, it took a lot of self motivation and long self-delivered pep talks to myself to get through one day and onto the next.

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*Friends*

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From Top-Left: Shivani, Garima, Arushi, Namrata, Pankaj, Rahul, Abhishek, Namrata, Nanaki, Isha and Srishti

I don’t have pictures with everyone, and couldn’t possibly fit them all in one post, so let me just start off by saying this: you don’t need a mention in black and white for me to acknowledge and deeply appreciate your support and love, always know that. I love you, and I value you, truly.

My friend circle is always changing and circumstantial at best (hello to all those who magically find my number when exams roll around), but there were many who stuck by my side even (and especially) when I wasn’t at my best. Shout outs here go to Ayushi, Shivani, Kanwar, Anshu, Kanika, Divya, Sagar, Sarthak and Akash. I’m eternally grateful to each person (you know who you are, picture/mention or not) who decided to chum it up with me when you could be doing anything else in the world.

I know I’m not always the easiest person to be around–and 2016 was especially difficult at times, considering the many major changes that my life was subjected to–but if you still chose to stick around, thank you.

Thanks to Garima for religiously picking the seat beside me and just being there (even on the days I was being a total tool), and choosing me over and over again. Thanks to Rahul for being my safe harbor since the first semester, my partner in crime no matter how utterly stupid my plans were. Thanks to Pankaj for saving me always, from getting my printouts at the last minute to saving me from the traffic police officer. Thanks to Nano for being who she is, my sassy, overachieving and immensely giving best friend who never hesitates to dish out the ugly truths to me when I’m going crazy. Thanks to Srish for never letting me feel like a day has passed since we last met, and for always being the voice of reason. Thanks to Isha for being her goofy yet compassionate self, the human equivalent of a warm fuzzy blanket that warms you all over.

I want to go on, but the list may probably never end. But again, I’m thankful to all of you

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*All The Bright Places*

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The best thing that 2016 did for me is that it pushed me to grow up. I have played the ‘big sister’ and ‘wise friend’ for as long as I can remember, and in doing so I had never really fully had the time and/or made the conscious effort to truly discover the person I am. And truthfully, I couldn’t have done it if I was living the same exact life that I had built for myself in the past two years. So, even though it was ugly and extremely difficult in the beginning, the change that came along with 2016 was a blessing in disguise.

This picture is of some of the best moments I’ve had this year. The one at the top left corner is of the movie ticket from the day I decided to go watch Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children alone as a treat to myself for holding it up during the semester. The one with the balloons is when I planned an elaborate surprise for my mom on her birthday, with a lot of help from Rahul and mom’s friends. The gifts are the ones I bought for my family when I was playing Santa on Christmas eve, and the one of mine next to it is in my car, my Baby who is my single most valuable possession in the entire world.

The remaining two pictures are from the camp that I went to in April which was a necessary evil that just needed to happen (read all about it here). Those five days were essential because not only did it clear out a lot of things for me, but also helped me gain confidence like never before. You know how they say ‘when push comes to shove’? Yeah, this was my much-needed shove.

Other than these, I also got appointed as the President of Wordsworth, which is the literary society at college, completed a year at my job as a content writer at Weaving Thoughts Pvt Ltd, and topped my class for the last two semesters. Most importantly though, 2016 made me realize how addicting it is to achieve something based on pure hard work, and that happiness can come from responsibility as well.


So, yeah. That’s about it.

That was my 2016 story.

It wasn’t all roses and happy days, but it wasn’t all brickbats, either.

There were days that tested us to the point of breaking, and there were days where happiness was everywhere, and both of them were equally important.

Here’s hoping that 2017 is another exciting year and takes us on new adventures and fun-filled journeys.

Happy 2017!

Love,

Snigdha

Eleven Down, One To Go


Hello, earthlings.

Welcome to the second last ‘Lessons of the Month’ post for 2016.

Honestly, this year has been a doozy of a year. Just a sad, pathetic excuse for a year. And after August, November surely turned out to be the black sheep of all the months.

Thanks, November.

I’m so glad you are finally done.

Honestly, I have made so many bad decisions this month, it is hardly funny. Just one bad choice right after another, despite an entire half of my brain yelling at me to not do this thing, to turn the other way. But did I listen? God, no. And as a result, I had to bear the consequences.

Ah, well. Bad days count for experience, right? And like the wise Colleen Hoover says in her novel Maybe, Someday: you need a couple of bad days to keep the good days in perspective. So, keeping that in mind, let’s recount the top three lessons learnt in the month of November. Ready? Here goes:

* Take time to love yourself. Do not push yourself to the point of destruction; nothing in this world is worth it.

* Never compromise on your integrity, your principles for anything at all.

* Persevere with everything that you are. Do not stop, and do not take shortcuts, because by doing so, you admit that you aren’t good enough.

Lesson #1 is a result of my body shutting down for a solid 72 hours last week when I came home after my last practical exam, then went to a wedding party, and woke up the next day with a sore throat, blocked nose, and a 102 degree fever. It took me three days to be able to stay upright for longer than ten minutes, and four and a half days before I could sit and even attempt to study.

Clearly, my body had had enough. So, you know, do not try this at home.

Lesson #2 and #3 are a culmination of the back-to-back exams that I’ve given this past month alone, which often need all of us to make certain tough choices. Whether or not you follow through with those choices though, is completely your call.

You know, this past year has been the craziest of all, but it has also taught me way more than the twenty before it. It has brought me closer to who I really am, and relieved me almost entirely of my escapist ways, if I may say so myself. We shall deliberate over all the magical happenings of 2016 soon, I promise you, ladies and gentlemen.

For now, I have six exams to give over two weeks, starting December 7, so please excuse me. You already know what you got to do: it’s now or never.

Love,

Snigdha

Deserve Everything


I know, I am fully aware of the fact that I haven’t posted much these past few months except the end-of-the-month posts–and for that, I apologize. But I’m here now, and that’s what matters, right?

So, hi. Firstly, let’s just all take a moment to realize the fact that 2016 is soon going to breathe its last, which is absolutely freaking me out. It’s like every year comes with new and improved speed, and the minute you feel like you have found your groove, oops it’s January 1 again.

Damn, time. Stick to one gear. This isn’t Formula 1, don’t be showing off your racing skills.

Another thing that does not make me too glad is my inability to participate in the National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo for short), thanks to the million exams that November comes with, one right after another. I have just been watching November fly right by for the past two years, while I study and make notes and write exams (and stalk other NaNoWriMo writers over on Instagram & Tumblr). It’s just sad, that’s all there is to it. It is just one of the many things that get sacrificed in the name of ‘hard work’ and ‘future’.

I get it, I really do; I understand that now is the time that you grind and work hard so that your future is secure and fulfilling, but on a day to day basis, it is difficult to continually remind myself of that. But hey, can’t complain, right?

Besides, the more work I put in now, the sooner I can start doing all the things that I truly love doing. Most mornings, when I feel my back hurting, the throbbing in my head so severe that my vision turns blurry, all I can think about is “I am so tired.” But despite what my body tells me, no matter how tired I feel, I know that I am more than that.

You know, of late, I feel like whatever I am doing now is going to have a direct and severe consequence on my future, which worries me and excites me, all the same. Slacking off is clearly not an option, and neither is dishonesty. I wear my pride like a shield, that keeps me from making bad choices, no matter how trivial they may seem. I take what I deserve, and I take only those things that I have worked for. It’s a thin line to walk, but I’ve seen my mother do it all my life, and I want to be just like her.

The point of this post is, if you want something, work hard for it. Do not wait around for someone to just hand it over to you, because success tastes sweeter than everything on this planet combined. To do that, you do not have to be lucky or smart; you just have to be deserving.

Like the wise Avett Brothers say:

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I shall see you guys soon with the November lessons. Until then you know what to do: live like it’s now or never.

Love,

Snigdha