Adulthood. In less than five hours. Now, if I say I’m not looking forward to midnight, and then the day that would follow, I’d be lying.
Well, it’s only normal that I’m (finally) excited. Despite all the pessimism and its-just-another-day thoughts that I’ve had, it’s impossible to deny that I want to turn 18. Another day or not, it’s a big moment, even if I’d be the only one to be happy about it and celebrate it.
It’s supposed to be about me, right? Good.
You know, looking back, it seems that it should have been harder to lose someone, or have them lose you, especially you weren’t even that capable of moving away or drifting apart. But it’s not like that. Adult or not, when two people don’t click, they just don’t. You cannot force them to.
Owing to this very unique property of the human mind (and heart), I’ve lost a couple of good friends in the last few years of my life. I’ve lost my mind, more than once. And for a brief period of my life, I had lost all reasons to go ahead, but thankfully, someone was there to pull me out of it (you can thank Avra, Ashley and Srishti for the great favour they did me.)
They made me believe in myself again, and this:
It’s crazy right? Just randomly stumbling across someone who takes up this really special spot in your heart, and then, you never want them to leave.
Tyler Johnson was one such person for me as well, in addition to the women mentioned above. He was just there, always at the right place, and the right time. And although he’s not here anymore, I really hope he’s happy wherever he is now. He deserves it.
I’m really emotional now, writing off of the maudlin sap that my heart’s filled with at the moment, so please excuse me if I get too corny. I guess it’s allowed once a year, isn’t it? 😉
Mom’s been all out, gathering up relatives for the big day. She’s been on the phone constantly for the past two hours, arranging stuff, bursting into hysterics that it won’t play out well, waving a pen at anybody who comes too close. But I know it’ll work out. With my mother, it always does. Period.
I don’t know what else to write, really. Maybe tomorrow, I’ll have tons to share, or maybe it’ll suck just about as much as I half-expect it to. We’ll just have to wait and see.
Catch you later, peeps. The weather is amazing, and you know I cannot resist rain and the smell of wet earth. It makes you want to fall in love. ♥