Do you know what emptiness looks like? Of course, you don’t. Like most of the downright annoying and unwanted stuff in life, you cannot see emptiness, or catch hold of it and beat the crap out of it.
But you can feel it, sure. And majority of the time, it’s not a nice feeling. It’s just kind of. . .empty. I’ve felt like that lately, just going through the motions because I have to. Because that’s what is expected out of me, a typical high-school senior with no authority whatsoever to make her own decisions.
Which sucks, by the way, if you were curious. I’m turning eighteen in exactly three months from today, strangely, when I look back at everything, I feel I haven’t done anything worthwhile, anything to make the world or even my life a tad better. Which sucks even more.
It was supposed to be exciting and easy, being an adult, finally, but if anything, it’s confusing. It was supposed to be about me. Instead, it is about everybody else, everybody who probably won’t even see me again for the rest of their lives. Everybody I could care less about.
My point is, is it really supposed to be this way? Confusing? Messy? Empty?
To find out the answer, I guess I’ll have to seek them out, and hunt them out with a shotgun in hand. The second option seems more interesting. 😉
‘You can live out the confusion, until it all becomes clear.’
Let’s try that too, shall we?