21 Life Lessons

You know, up until last year, I was convinced that all birthdays deserve to be celebrated grandly, especially the milestone ones like, well, the 21st.

Cut to now, today, to the eve of my 21st birthday, and I feel like the real purpose of birthdays is not to just grab a couple of greetings and eat cake (cake is important, though), but to reminisce the years gone by, and celebrate the victories you have had over time. The said victories need not be something monumental; they just have to be important and meaningful to you. You have made it this far, through the mess and gore and the sadness and the pain—-and if that isn’t reason enough to pat yourself on the back and smile, I don’t know what is.

So, in honor of completing twenty one years of life as Snigdha Rai, daughter, sister, and caffeine-addict, I want to share with all of you twenty one life lessons that I’ve learnt over the past years. Consider this as my gift to all of you wonderful people who take time out of their day to read this blog.

Ready? Here goes:

1. Sometimes, keeping quiet is the safest option, but not always the correct one.

2. There is such a thing as waiting too long; don’t make that mistake. ‘Right time’ is a myth.

3. It’s easier to ask for forgiveness, than to ask for permission.

4. Some things are easier said with a phone line and a couple of miles in between, than in person.

5. Best friends are not supposed to be the wise ones; they are supposed to be the ones that have your back even when they know you are headed for a dead-end.

6. Family is a transitory concept, so it is utterly foolish to accept that things will stay the same forever. For better or for worse, they shall change.

7. Give people more credit than they deserve, always, so that when they screw up, you can yell ‘I told you so’ in their stupid faces.

8. Don’t stick around people who radiate negativity, or make you feel bad about yourself. Their insecurities feed off of your existence, and you don’t want to give them that pleasure, trust me.

9. Find what you love, and keep tremendously interested in it, come what may.

10. There will always be that one place where you can find true peace, even if your world is in shambles. Discover that place, and escape there whenever things go sideways.

11. Self love should be your topmost priority, always.

12. People are always a little too quick to form expectations, especially if it is convenient to them; don’t feel bad if they tell you they are ‘disappointed’, because mostly, that ‘disappointment’ only stems from inconvenience, not love.

13. Experience everything, but also resign yourself from the influences of them.

14. There is always a better life out there, and you are worth it. Always keep working in the direction of the life you want to live.

15. Never, ever apologize for feeling something.

16. Things don’t judge you, people do. Your nerdy glasses won’t judge you for wearing them, but the stupid thick-headed mean girl would.

17. Intentions matter, facts do not. They are as different as a page and a story; a single page does not tell you the whole story.

18. People can only affect you for as long as and as much as you let them.

19. Relationships are not bargain deals: you shouldn’t have to put up with anyone’s shit just because you like someone you both know.

20. Fall in love on the daily, with the littlest of things: the rain, the sun, and just life in general.

21. Be grateful for every new day, every new chance to right the wrongs, and live life a little more.



Bit different than my usual birthday posts each year, I know, but hey, it’s the Big 21–different is cool. Tomorrow is The Day, but I have college till 5, then probably a quiet dinner with the family is probably what’s going to happen. Dad’s not here, so I’m dialing back on the celebrations until we can all be together and celebrate. I want to take this time to say thank you for every single person who has been a part of my life for the past year (or ever, actually), good or bad, because I’m sure I have learnt something or the other from you. So, thanks.

Here’s hoping that the years to come shall arrive bearing their own gifts and surprises, and bucket loads of experiences.

Here’s hoping that we all find we are looking for, and also what we aren’t quite sure we need.

Here’s to life❤

I’ll see you later, hopefully with pictures from the celebrations. I’ll try to click pictures of everything I do, but no promises. Meanwhile, you do whatever makes you happy. It’s now, or it’s never.



Nine Down, Three To Go

Hello, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to another Lessons Of The Month post.

You know, in retrospect, I think that doing this post at the end of every month has not only been crucial in maintaining regularity in posting, but also help me stop for a hot minute and just be, you know? Just having a single minute to do nothing but breathe is a great way to keep all your crazy locked in, trust me.😉

Okay, so about September: it was one hell of a ride, in all honesty, like it usually is. September is the go-between, the buffer between hot, sweaty days of summer, and the cool, crisp winter. But more than anything else, it comes with this sense of purpose that puts me in the correct head space, no matter how lost or disoriented I am. It just clears up the mist, enough for me to realize what’s important and what isn’t.

Well, now that we’re all upto speed, let’s recount the lessons what the ninth month of the year has been kind enough to teach us, shall we? Let’s go:

  • Fear is what holds people back, keeps them from being who they should be, or who they are destined to be.
  • People are free to make their own choices, and the fact that we do or do agree with their choices may not be of prime importance to them. Learn to be okay with that, learn to respect their choices.
  • One step backward today can easily be compensated with two steps forward the next day, so don’t beat yourself up too much for not being your one-hundred percent every single moment of every single day.

As I told you guys in my last post, I’m turning 21 next month, and for the first time in my entire existence, I feel like I’m finally at a place in my life where I can rehash everything that has been weighing down on me since I don’t know when. It’s still a work in progress (it’s twenty one years worth of baggage people, come on), but at least it’s begun.

This year, I’m going to break all the rules all the freaking way and instead of letting people chart out my birthday for me (hell, no), I’m going to do it myself. Dad’s not here, which is the reason I’ve given my mother and sister to back up and not plan anything, and I have college anyway. To be honest, I’m just so tired of the routine, the expectedness that is associated with the one day that is supposed to be unpredictable, exciting and well, joyful.

Also, I’ve been on a roll with picking out and buying gifts for myself (perks of having a job), one of which is already on its way. Keep a lookout on my Instagram to know what it is😀

Ladies and gentlemen, it is going to be a wonderful day, because we are going to make very, very sure of that.


Clock’s ticking, and there is absolutely zero time to waste. You do not need anybody else to count down the days to your birthday, because at the end of it all, that day will never hold as much importance to them as it does to you.

Like I always say, it’s now or never.



#21Till21: 21 Things I Love

Yes, you know what’s up, don’t you?

It’s September.

Which is awfully close to October.

And my birthday.

Today, September 14, means that there are exactly 21 days to go for my 21st birthday. Yep, you read it right: I’m turning the big twenty-one, and despite the fact that my real-life birthday plans are non-existent (and most probably shall be), I intend to at least share my life with all of you here.

So, with all that out of the way, I compiled a list of 21 things that I love. Keep in mind that most of these are mostly material things and/or phenomenon, because come on, I obviously love my family and friends to the moon and back. It didn’t make much sense reiterating the same fact.

Okay, you ready? Let’s go:

1. Coffee, duh!

There is possibly no way that I can stress my love for coffee enough. It has just always been a very big part of my life, my go-to whenever I’m feeling stressed/sad/happy or just about any whacked up emotion that has me going around in circles. It is, and will always be, my very first love.

2. Petrichor

3. Driving

My baby, my treasure

 When life isn’t making any kind of sense, all I have to do is get my keys, and hit the road. My car has been privy to almost all of my heartbreaking, hysterical crying sessions, the best drive ever of my life (no details for you, sorry), and has also played a big part in my 20th birthday celebrations.

4. Being responsible

I have always had issues with authority, with all the rules that are just laid down for us to obey, and ever since I remember, I haven’t done anything that I didn’t fully agree with. Hence, I decided to take matters in my own hands (when I was about 10, before my sister came along), and the rest is history. Being responsible and getting things done gives me an immense sense of pleasure like nothing else.

5. Making people smile

Speaking from experience, there’s nothing quite like the warm feeling in your heart that you get from watching a smile break out across someone’s lips, and knowing that you are the reason behind it.

6. Alone time

Personally, I feel like one should designate one day each week solely to recuperate mentally, and just give yourself a break. Hence, whenever I do get a chance to be alone and just spend time with myself and my thoughts, I grab it with both hands.

7. Maggi!

After coffee, Maggi is my only vice. I just can’t get enough of it, ever. Ever since I knew what Maggi was, I have been absolutely in love with it, and even today, when I achieve something, cooking Maggi for myself is the first thing that I do to celebrate.

8. Train rides

9. Supernatural

The Winchesters

The Winchesters

Supernatural was the one to teach me that family doesn’t end with blood–it is, in fact, something that you get to create for yourself, and they always have your back, even (and especially) when you don’t have a snowball’s chance of winning the war you’re fighting.

10. One Tree Hill

If you are ever looking for solutions to some of the trickiest situations in life, One Tree Hill is definitely the place to look for them, honey.

11. Red tulips

12. Powerpuff Girls

I still sit with my sister (who is ten, by the way) every weekend in the mornings and watch these girls save the city. Yeah, I know: I have a problem.

13. Pokémon

When I was in third grade was when Pokémon started airing in India, at 5 in the evening from Monday to Friday. Let’s just say that I have taken countless beatings from my mom just to sit and watch this show religiously. I even have bundles of sketchbooks wherein I have drawn all of my favourite Pokémons!

14. Books

People like David Levithan and Sarah Dessen are my heroes. Their books give me strength and sanity when nothing makes any kind of sense.

15. Fairy lights on trees

If you are a kind soul who wants to ever surprise me, be sure to include these beauties!

16. Writing

Writing gives me purpose; it gives me sense of balance, a sense of worth–like I am doing something bigger and better than just breathing the air in and breathing it out.

17. Classic rock

18. Scented candles

 19. Bangles


Hoarding bangles of all colours is the one guilty pleasure I have. Currently, my collection lacks orange, and indigo.

20. Tikki

I grew up with my mother’s love for street food, and while my sister accompanies mom to all the chaat stalls, I stick to my beloved tikki.

21. Birthdays

I like other people’s birthday more than I like my own, and although this year has been deprived of the usual excitement (details later), I still do feel that birthdays are the best days of the year.

Okay, so that was fun.

Exams are due next Monday, so kindly excuse me while I hit the books, and try to learn at least something of importance from them.

Meanwhile, you do whatever makes you happy.

See you!



Eight Down, Four To Go

I swear, it feels like only yesterday I was writing about April, and there were eight months left in 2016.

Cut to today, and August’16 is breathing its last.

Remember how I told you August is an out-an-out craptastic month? Yep, it didn’t disappoint this year, either. The last 31 days have been, well, strange, for the lack of a better word. I don’t usually take so long to find my footing once college starts, but things got a little too crazy this time.

Ah, well. At least it is over now.

So, ready for the top three lessons of the month? Here goes:

1. Spend time, energy and efforts on things and people who make you genuinely happy, put the shine back in your eyes.

2. Breaking old rules and patterns is how new worlds emerge. Go on, change something and watch it all play out.

3. True faith never dwindles with setbacks; it only gets stronger. Believe.

August was terribly difficult for me to get through last year, and although things were very different this time around, the crux remains the same: the best way to keep yourself from falling off the bicycle, is to keep moving. One day at a time, one big bad thing after another.

I mean, let’s face it: there is no way that you can run away from whatever chaos is going on in your life, at least not forever. The past has a way of catching up to you in not-so-nice ways, and then you have no other choice but to stand your ground, and deal. Might as well do it now than later, right?

Anyway, so exams are starting September 19th, and that, sadly, means the end of my late night The Flash and Supernatural binge-watch sessions (mom actually threatened me to stop it). Don’t you feel sorry for me? You should. I mean, just, have you seen Barry Allen and Dean Winchester? Let’s just say that this is one of those times when I want to drop everything and just stay in bed all day in my pyjamas.


See you again soon, once the mayhem that is my sister’s birthday is over. She’s turning 10 tomorrow, that little devil. If you follow me on Instagram (@snigdharai5), you would know what’s up with me, other than the general glories of being an engineering undergrad.

Till next time, fellas!




“In your entire life, you can probably count your true friends on one hand. Maybe even on one finger. Those are the friends you need to cherish, and I wouldn’t trade one of them for a hundred of the other kind. I’d rather be completely alone than with a bunch of people who aren’t real. People who are just passing time.”

— Sarah Ockler

Yeah, yeah, you already know what’s up, don’t you? It’s friendship day, ladies and gentlemen, and for the first ever in the six years this blog has been alive, I’m going to go ahead and share with you my most personal of, well, feelings about the people who have been a part of my life.

You see, since I was maybe four, I knew that I could exist entirely inside my head–which obviously meant social awkwardness for years to come (still working on it, at almost 21), and very few friends. I could maintain genial relations with most people, but there were mostly only a handful whom I allowed too close.

My first friend was Adyasha, in kindergarten. I don’t know where she is right now, despite hours spent trying to locate her on all social networking platforms. She was inhumanly adorable, wore glasses, and bought these insanely good roast potatoes for lunch. On the days that she had the potatoes for lunch, I would beg her to trade lunches with me, and you know what? She did! I can still remember the taste, you know. I have, since then, tried many times to replicate the recipe, but I haven’t quite gotten the exact taste.

Anyway, Adyasha was a great friend, for the two years that she went to my school, before shifting to Hyderabad for good. She was the first one to show me how good company could be. I really hope and pray I can connect with her again.


As you can probably tell, my habits haven’t changed much since kindergarten. I still like to spend time alone, still am too damn choosy about who gets to see my vulnerable side. But there are three people who have seen it all: the good, the bad, the ugly, the awesome. You know them, too.

Meet L4W:

(L-R): Srishti, Nanaki, Isha, me.

(L-R): Srishti, Nanaki, Isha, me.

This is our farewell picture from January 2014. School was ending, things were changing at warp speed, everything was just dizzying, to say the least, but we have held on to each other through all of it, and still do. We created LifeFourWays together, a place all of us can return to and find each other. What we have, it cannot be explained like a normal phenomenon, because it is anything but normal, you know? But I’ll try anyway:

L4W meets are always super fun, and filled with rants and great food. Even with all fours of us hardly being able to see each other more than twice a year (thanks, college), we can always pick up where we left off. Time is inconsequential, as far our friendship is concerned.

Here is a little trip down memory lane:


TFIOS date with L4W❤


At Starbucks. Credits: Nanaki Singh

L4W has a permanent place on my phone’s home screen (to help me get through the tough times), as well as in my heart. These girls make sucky situations suck a whole lot less, and all that I have to do is pick up the phone, and dial any (or all) of their phone numbers. I honestly do not know where I would have been without Srish, Isha and Nans.

Apart from L4W, ever since college began, many people have came into my life in the past two years. I do realize that everyone enters other people’s lives with the intention of staying, but sometimes, things just don’t pan out that way. I can say this, because I am guilty of this, too. People leave, things change, you live and you learn. I have received way more love than what I’d expected when college started, and I’m grateful for everything. Many, many thanks to everyone who’s been there with me and for me, for however short a time. Special mentions go to: Sagar, Pankaj, Bangtan ARMY, Karan and Ayushi.

A little sneak peek:


Shivani aka Squirtle. Picture Credits: Jatin


(L-R): Rahul, me, Garima. Studying for a practical exam.




(L-R): Rahul, Sreyoshi, me, Astha, Kirthika, Garima, Shubham. #20thBirthday

Before I leave, I want to dedicate this song to everyone mentioned in this post, which once Nano dedicated to me. Ironically, the song is titled Army.


I miss you, I love you, and I thank you for all the memories, everyone.

Happy Friendship Day.

Stick around with the ones that make you feel happy, people. On a planet wrought with evil and despair, friendship is as close to utopia as your world will ever get.